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Writer's picturemheventspdx

Who Gets Invited To This Thing?

We are kicking off a 2 week series about Invitations and Save the Dates! This week we will chat about how to tackle your guest list but check back next week for some awesome new trends for 2020 for paper products. Ready, Set, Goooooo.

Photo By Jessie Schultz Photography

The guest list can truly be the hardest part of planning for most of our couples so I wanted to start with a few do's and don'ts on the etiquette front. Start with making your list of everyone, then reach out to the fam and see who they want to add. You can give them a limit (which they may not stick to) or you can just go all in and see what everyone comes up with. Then go through and combine the lists and take out all the duplicates. How's that number? Good? Well then you're the two luckiest people getting married ever. Most people take a look at that first list and go "um, uh oh." If that's your life right now don't worry. Go through and tier people. Yep, that's right, number people that HAVE to be invited with a 1 and then people who you would like to rotate in as you get no's with a 2. Then even have a 3 category for newer friends, or work pals or others that you can throw into the game at the last minute and they will be none the wiser. Does that look better? I sure hope so because if not it's time to take out the Excel axe and chop some cells out of that dang spreadsheet.



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THIS IS IMPORTANT SO READ THIS PART! Don't get caught being a Rudey Mc.Ruderson early in this process. Make sure everyone who gets a Save the Date (if you do them) gets an invite. So only those tier 1's should be getting one. I know, it sounds crazy but if you get too pumped and add those 2's and find out they can't get the golden ticket then it's not a good look. I know it seems like this stuff is silly but it really matters!



After you send some Save the Dates don't be shy about reaching out to family (especially those who have to travel) to see who is interested in coming. If they know already then you can start rotating in your 2's and sending pre-info to them. Most family is really open about their ability to travel so having these conversations openly is amazing. It also helps your cousin who lives in Switzerland and is a student to hear that you would love to have her come but you totally get it if a giant trip in the middle of her semester isn't possible. Talk to your people! Get the info!


Your pretty pretty invites should be sent out about 10-12 weeks before the wedding date. You can toootally push it to 8 weeks if you get crazy and can't get them out. Pro Tip: If you do a wedding website make sure it's done (including registry) before you send them out. People will look at it right when they get their invite and one more time the week of the wedding so make sure you give them the tools to book their lodging and know what they are RSVPing for at that first peek. Set that RSVP date for 4-5 weeks before the wedding. Getting no's stick in some alternates!


Doing digital invites? Super cool and the environment totally thanks you! Just make sure to send an email blast that is just from your personal email to your guests directly to let people know that you sent it. Sometimes your older family members miss it or it goes to spam and you may miss some guests that way.


Lastly, if you are suuuuper close to your venue capacity make sure you leave room for 5 folks that you have to add last minute the week of the wedding. Be prepared for the surprise and then you can not worry about the last revolving door of people.



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